The Power of Eye Gazing


It is time to get into it. I have shared different warm-up exercises that may or may not be used, but I want you to have them in your toolbox. I use them all at various times and situations as they all have different strength, weaknesses, and effects.

What I would say as a general rule to increase the connection between the two of you is to talk less and touch more.

Eye Gazing

The first exercise you probably know from another time, and that is eye gazing. It is really simple. Start by sitting opposite the other person, point to each other’s left eye, then put down your hands. Then simply looking into the person’s left eye and stay in the experience silently for at least 5 minutes.

At times what can come up are visions which can be alarming and even a little bit scary in the beginning. Just sit and breathe through it.

It is also good practice to open your heart to the other person in this exercise. A good mantra for both to say is: "Deep in my heart, I feel love for you. And I know that deep in your heart you are feeling love for me".

If either of you has preexisting disagreements or conflicts with the other person, know that these might come up while you are eye gazing. I recommend that the two of you sit together for a longer time, breathing deeply, and try to relax into the situation or tensions. I also suggest that the two of you go directly into some gentle touch exercises instead of speaking as talking can quickly increase the distance between you.


The Power of Authentic Relating

Authentic relating

I want to introduce a really powerful exercise I learned from Authentic World and when I facilitate Authentic Games Nights. It is an icebreaker to bring conversations deeper and to know what is going on with each other.  You are simply sharing one's truth in the present moment and letting the other person in on one's inner experience. Instead of talking in the past or future or make a long story, we bring the conversation into the very present moment. We share only:

What we see, think, feel or any body-sensations we are having at the moment. It can be like this: 

Person 1: When I am sitting with you, I am getting aware that I am not breathing. I have some contraction in my solar plexus and stomach. I am a bit tired.

Person 2: Hearing you say that I get aware of…..I am not really breathing, that I have some pressure in my head and I am a bit sad.

Person 1: Hearing you say that I get aware of…..I start to feel my heart and experience some love there. I breathe a bit deeper, and I begin to relax more.

Person 2: Hearing you say that I get aware of….. and it goes back and forth….


Let's continue to bring more practices into our toolbox.